These Lines that I Know are Beginning to Show in My Face.....Reflections on Linda Ronstadt: The Sound of My Voice

A couple of weeks ago a friend from high school put up a picture of a little child with his hand over his heart and the caption reads "That feeling you get when the music touches your soul."  I took a screen shot because it spoke to me.  For as long as I can remember music has touched my soul.  All kinds of music, all kinds of lyrics, and all kinds of harmony.  While most young girls had crushes on Donny Osmond or Bobby Sherman my heart fell on artists like Dan Fogelberg, James Taylor, and oddly enough, Charlie Rich.  I fell in "love" with the lyrics and harmonies of Dan and James and the piano playing and  story telling of Charlie Rich.  My mom used to order from the Columbia Record Club and it was a great day when the Charlie Rich or the new Carol King album arrived in the mail.  I would literally set up the album covers in rows in our den and pretend like these people were in the audience while I sang into a hairbrush from the fireplace at the top of my lungs.  In my mind, if only I could collaborate with these people whose music I loved so much, my voice would be heard and my soul would be touched.   Then came the music of Linda Ronstadt.  

The first song I can remember hearing from Linda Ronstadt was "Long Long Time."  I don't know exactly how old I was but the haunting way she sang those lyrics and the force with which she hit the high note at the end struck home with my young self.  Back in the day we had albums.....five songs on each side.  I listened to my Linda Ronstadt albums over and over and over.  To this day I can tell you what song comes next because in my world it was one long song only interrupted by the brief crackling of the LP between songs.  A few years ago my son gave me a turntable for Christmas.  I keep it in my office and play my albums a lot....just so I can hear the crackling and occasional skipping in the vinyl. 

Last week my husband, Battle,  and I went to see the documentary about Linda Ronstadt's career. She was his"first crush" and the fact that he could play almost all of her early songs on the guitar was one of the first things I liked about him.  Linda now has Parkinson's Disease and can no longer sing like she used to.  The theatre was full of people who were about my age, many older than me.  The movie, which was beautifully done, started with Linda's childhood and told about her love for music and her rise to fame.  She talked about her love for songs and all kinds of music.  When she would hear a song it didn't matter what genre it was if she liked the song she "knew she had to sing it."  Thus,  she had pop, country, musical theater, Spanish, and opera on her resume.  It documented how she believed in herself and her instincts.  She worked with her fellow artists instead of trying to compete with them.  She travelled extensively making it difficult to have a family or home.  She is intelligent and strong in her beliefs.  Of course, when I was growing up I could have cared less about any of this.  I just knew that her voice and music touched my soul. 

The morning after seeing the movie I was getting ready to go somewhere and decided to pull up Linda Ronstadt music on my Spotify.  It took all of thirty seconds for me to grab my hairbrush and start singing at the top of my lungs.  Every single word, every single nuance, every single harmony.  They all came back as if I was thirteen years old in my den having my own personal concert.  I sang until I was hoarse.  That night my husband came home and told me of his day.

"This might seem strange to you but I decided to listen to Linda Ronstadt on my Spotify in my truck today.  For a half a second I closed my eyes and I was fourteen years old, sitting in my bedroom, playing that album over and over.  Just for a bit I was back there and when I opened my eyes, i caught a glance of myself in the rearview mirror and remembered that I am now 58."

NO, it didn't sound strange, for I had experienced the same thing earlier that morning.   I have read before that people who have "end of life" experiences sometimes experience bright vibrant lights and beautiful music as they pass to the next life.   One man said that all music, songs, and harmonies that he had ever loved throughout life were playing as one song with more beautiful tones than he had ever heard.  I won't know until I pass but I think that "Heart Like a Wheel," with it's beautiful harmonies will be one of the songs that ushers me into Heaven.   Thank you, Linda Ronstadt for sharing your voice and your music with my generation.